fresh and new

it has been a very long time since i've written here. i figured it's a new year, what the heck?

i am no longer making donuts. waking up at 3 & 4 am really took it's toll on my body and spirit. i'm not a young thing, i need my sleep. even though i have left the yeast and glaze behind, i have nothing but positive vibes from the experience. i am so thankful for the people i met and got to know there. good people. people who made me a better person and my life a better place. i learned a lesson that only living in the moment could have taught me.

thankful is the spirit i want manifested as a start to this new year. i am so very thankful for what my life is and what is in it.

our theme for 2010 was "simplify" and i think we did a great job on follow through. we moved from 2000 sq ft to 1100. we got rid of even more stuff during that move. we are now down to the bare minimum in the area of material possessions (although i will confess that my dear, sweet and perfect husband gifted me with a macbook pro AND a new flat screen tv for our anniversary and christmas). the kids are not always joyful living so small and i am sympathetic. our dreams are not always theirs.

i want to continue with simplicity for 2011, but i want to add gratitude, peace and joy.

simple and cheap

several weeks ago i blogged about how i came home from wherever i had been to find a for sale sign in my front yard. at that time, i was all about putting off moving until there was a firm offer on the house. i am over waiting until the offer comes. i am in no way interested in having to vacate up to 7 people everytime the realtor wants to show the house. besides, my mom has "her shows" in the evenings and doesn't like us intruding on them (her home was our refuge during the showings).

the house we have been in for the past year is rather on the large side. it is an much older home, but very spacious. not to sound ungrateful, but i hate it. it's too big. there is too much to clean. it's too much to cool and in winter you can't get it warm. this summer (which has been ridiculous hot) the second floor where my big kids rooms are have been almost unusable due to the heat. we have lots of unused space in the living and dining areas, so it doesn't have a homey feel. plus, it is a huge chunk of our monthly income.

i was ready to try out rv living, something tim wasn't quite ready for. keeping simplicity and sustainability in mind (both very important to tim and i), we decided on a 2 bedroom/2 bath older home. actually, it was all that was available in the neighborhood where we currently live and wanted to stay. it is two blocks from our current location, so again we don't have far to move (our last move wasn't even off the block, we just moved from one end to the other).

i know you are gasping at putting 7 people into a two bedroom. people, it is possible. luckily, our kids value simplicity. they understand the give and take. the home has a roomy dining area that once enclosed, will bring the bedroom total to three. i'm just thankful for the two bathrooms. we have lived small in the past, but never with two bathrooms!

so, here we go again. i have every hope that we will be here for at least three years. long enough for me to finish the degree that i have been working on since 1992 and to further establish my place in the donut world.

super fly

sit down. are you sitting? i need you to be sitting for what i am about to type.
okay, i am the owner of a pair of sketcher shape-ups.

the above pair is very simillar to the pair i now own. if my camera had batteries i could show you my actual pair. they are a (orthopedic) beaut.

turns out the donut biz is a very physically demanding world. after my first day i was basically disabled. my legs and ankles hurt like i had used them for the first time. i am truly ashamed at how little i use my body. apparently, you need to use your muscles more vigorously than walking from the bed to the recliner and back to the computer. say what?

my mother, who is also a proud shape-ups wearer, promised me that these shoes are an absolute miracle. they would allow me to be on my feet for 8 hours on a concrete floor, stooping, bending and lifting and my legs, ankles and feet would think they had been caressed in a cloud of pink cotton candy while tiny cherubic baby angels frolic near by. i tried to resist the pressure my mom was applying. i stood my ground while i tried on 3 pairs of nikes and 1 pair of saucony's. the shape-ups were the most comfortable of the 5 pairs i tried on. i do think that having only 3 hours of sleep the night before left me weak to my mother's power. she's my kryptonite.

i don't know if i would agree that they are like walking on cotton candy, they DO make me taller tho. they claim that they improve posture. lord knows i need help in that area. i tend to be a hunchback. hooray! i wont need boniva in my future! thanks shape-ups (sorry sally field). another boast is the firming of your abdominal area. uhh, no way am i going to believe that shoes with a three inch rocking sole are going to tighten my "i birthed 6 children" abdominal area.

word.

i don't know how this donut thing is going to work out for me. i should not be allowed to ever touch a cash register. even when every single button is clearly marked. i should also never be allowed to make change. even when the exact amount of change that i need to give back is clearly displayed about a foot from my face.

i thought i had a good memory. i don't know if it is because i am learning so many new things, but my retention lasts about 7 seconds. i am supposed to take an order, repeat the order as i am taking it and then repeat it again as i am handing it to the customer. this is not going so well for me. i take the order, repeat the order as i am taking the order and then my mind goes completely blank. i mean nothing. i haven't gotten a repeat back to the customer order correct yet. not even one time. in other words, i have gotten a customer order repeat back correct zero times.

who would have known that donuts would be the most difficult job i have ever had? gosh. oh well, if i get fired, i will still have my shape-ups.

donuts aren't the only thing rising in my life. when i came home the other day there was a for sale sign in our yard. our lease was up in july and the owner wants to sell the house, so i guess we are moving. since 2006 we have moved 5 times. i think that makes us nomads. time to invest in a yurt? seriously, the thought of finding another home and then moving to that home is really close to exceeding the bounderies of my sanity.

i think i am going to see how this thing goes before i start freaking about finding another house. we are supposed to get 24 hours notice to show the house. there is no way that 24 hours would allow me the time to get even MY room ready to show to a potential buyer. after experiencing my room, all he would have to do is open the under stairs cupboard (imagine harry potter at the dursley's) and sniff. it smells like musty farts, mushrooms and dead body. i am going to roll the dice and see just how long we can ride this thing.

i will keep you up to date on the status of my job, how my shape-ups are working and my house (not) hunting.

doughnut freedom

several months ago i quit my corporate job. i was miserable. the corporate kiss ass world is so not me. i am NOT a kiss ass. i am the opposite of a kiss ass. i don't give a flying *f what people think of me. i really don't. lots of people say that, i mean it. i don't care. i might not have it all figured out, but i do know that i don't need to be working anywhere that i have to wear slacks. my "i don't give and *f" attitude doesn't go well with working for "the man". i tend to want to do things my way and "the man" likes things done his way.

i wanted to be at home with my kids. i wanted to be a part of their lives again, to know what was going on with them. they are all teenagers, so i was feeling the urgency to reconnect before they left us. tim had finally gotten a REALLY stupendous job and we are good at treading the waters of one income.

so, here i am. at home. actually, i am at home from 11 am on. i missed working a bit and really wanted some extra income to eventually squirrel away. so, i am working from 3:45 to 11. that is am, folks. what am i doing from 3:45 to 11 am you ask? i am making doughnuts. i wanted something that i could do and still be at home. doughnuts are not life or death. doughnuts are not so stress laden that you have to come home and be in a vegetative state for the entire evening to recover from your day. doughnuts don't mind if you are having a crappy day. doughnuts aren't petty. they don't stab you in the back, play games, gossip, stir up shit, put you on an action plan or send you home for wearing capri pants. doughnut's don't care what you wear to work (as long as you are wearing the appropriate t-shirt) and they don't talk, they can't yell.

for me, doughnuts equal a certian amount of freedom. the freedom to have income, but on my terms. i can be perfectly comfortable in my jeans and doughtnut shirt. i am not ashamedly trying to cover my beloved tattoos like they are in someway bad. the ring in my nose is completely acceptable. my dreads are embraced since my hair needs to be covered with a headwrap of my choosing anyway.

i know many people wont get it. they will feel sorry for poor melissa who is 36 and still doesn't have her life together, she has to work in a doughnut shop. to those people i say "i don't care what you think. you are narrow minded and materialistic. i know that i don't have to work a minimum wage job. i am perfectly capable of going back to medical billing, coding and insurance. there are PLENTY of jobs out there in thoes areas. i am aware that i could be making more than twice what i am making now. thanks for your unwanted sympathy".

for those of you who do get it, i am excited about my doughnut liberation.

* the use of the letter "f" instead of the word fuc out of respect for my mother who raised me better. i do use the f word quite frequently.

green smoothie

part of my daily routine is my green smoothie. i feel actual guilt when i miss my green smoothie, so i try not to. these pictures are of the smoothie i had today. it's very green. the reason it's so green is because i used half a box of baby spinach to make it. the straw is glass. it's from glassdharma, check 'em out!

here's whats in my usual smoothie

• 1 orange


• 1 frozen banana


• 2 cups of no sugar added frozen fruit blend


• lots and lots of baby spinach. like i said above, i use about half a box of the baby spinach that you can find by the bagged salad.


• filtered water

sometimes i play with different variations. if i have fresh pineapple i add some. it makes the smoothie very sweet. yesterday i did blueberries, banana, orange, pineapple and spinach. yum!

green smoothies are an easy way to put good stuff in your body and it's a staple if you are eating raw. i highly recommend green smoothie revolution if you want to find out more about the benefits of drinking green smoothies and hundreds of recipes (even smoothies for your fur children).

you spin me right round, baby!

saturday brennah, kam, kass and mara headed to round rock for our first meet up with the austin hoopers. it was a blast. bren, kam and kass all suprised me with a natural hooping talent. the instructor also gave us examples of poi. of course, the girls tried their hand at poi and when they found out that fire is often involved, they were asking for poi lessons.


we are looking forward to our next lesson!

achieving peace

school is out, summer is here. time for deschooling! my foremost goal for this summer is peace. peace in the home. peace outside of the home. peace in our universe.